Friday, August 15, 2008

The space between a blink and a tear

About 10:30 last night, my friend Jade called me. I know I've mentioned her before.

We spent about an hour on the phone. She and he husband had gotten into a huge fight. He said some really horrible things to her. Things like he never really loved her and he only married her because she was a porn star. (Yes, she's done porn. No, I haven't seen any, nor do I want to.) Needless to say, she was really upset.

During the hour we were on the phone, she started telling me all these things I'd never known about her. I knew about the psychological issues, the heroin use, the fetish modeling, the dancing (she HATES being called a "stripper"), the porn, and the fact that she's been raped. What I didn't know about was the childhood neglect, the molestation, and the fact that she's been raped more than once.

She was just spilling her guts to me about everything. I didn't really talk much. I didn't know what to say.

Before we got off the phone, she told me how much she loved me and what a great friend I've always been to her.

About 4:30 this morning, her husband called me. Right when I was about to rip him a new asshole for being such a douchenozzle, he told me Jade had tried to kill herself. She'd taken a bunch of ambien, xanax, vicodin and oxycontin and chased it with a bottle of vodka.

He'd gotten her to the hospital in time to help her. They pumped her stomach, then told him she was going to be fine.

She's going to be under psychiatric evaluation for a while. I hope she gets all the help she needs.

He assured me that he did, in fact, love her and the he said the things he said out of anger. He felt horrible because he felt she did this because of him. He said he's going to do all he can to make it up to her. I want to believe him. He did save her life.

I really do think that this was just a cry for help. I think if she'd really wanted to die, she would have done it some other way. Or done it when/where there was no chance of being found until it was too late. But she's alive and she's getting help. That's all that matters now.

Get better soon Jade. I love you.


~Sheila~ said...

I'm so sorry for your friend. It sounds like she was dealing with a lot underneath it all to begin with and then to have someone she loves reject her in such a way.
I hope she continues to get the help that she needs and continues to have the support of her friends like you who love her.

Shelby said...

I read somewhere, a long time ago, that some crazy high percentage of people who survivie suidice attempts realize during that the don't actually want to die, they just want to show people how serious they are.

I hope she gets better, and I'm sure with friends like you to support her, she will.

What a fabulous and fantastic lady you are.

scargosun said...

I am so glad you were there for her when she needed you. I really do hope that she is ok and that she can get some help for her psychological issues. So many people don't b/c they worry that people wont believe them or that they are feeling sorry for themselves and it is so sad.

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